So far I am making it through...actually this place is funny if nothing, Since my last post I have discovered that the Zen-beings here are just like you and me. They gossip, fight, natter, and be slack asses at times. I guess it is true, we are all one. Oh yeah they cook using sugar (I pass on it though) and go into town for coffe and drinks...again I am passing.
A lot of them are additicted to ice cream and they go to town for that as well. Again not me.
However, the sits are BRUTAL...(my back is in pain) three times a day morning noon and dinner...but I can see the value I them in only five short ( long for me) days. The world shouls STOP three times a day...way more productive.
Guess what?.. I got another roommate yesterday and she is from SEATTLE!!!!!! Can I manifest or what. She is only here for a week but I'll take it. She drove here and I have to admit that it did cross my mind to catch a ride home with her, but I am not going to do it.
The one thing I am freaking out on is all the granola ways here. I mean they are seriously anti- fashion. I have had to have so many conversations explaning that a pedicure is good hygiene NOT a luxury. This place is really dirty too...(not the kitchen so much...thank GOD).
Until my Seattle buddy got here I was the only one with toe nail polish. Yikes!....this has for sure cured me of my slack ass sweat pants ways. Just not attractive.
The monks freaked out at how well and how quickly I can clean...I credited having had an Italian mother. They had to think up jobs for me to do cause I was finishing my assisgments in half of the time. The rest of the crew has since come to me and ask me to slow down. "nuff said I get the game now. It made me realize though that our business AND personal standards are really high. As a family we might benefit from dialing some things down a notch or two. It has also made me realize how hard I am on myself and my family, (sorry guys).
I spend a lot of time watching the "movie" here...it has become my entertainment. Lot's of Europeans here..and some of them I am really grateful they have choosen the Zen path 'cause they look mean and hard.
All in all though I have to say that I have learned somethings in the past five days. I am excitied to see who I will be when I leave here.
On a more sparkly note, I went into Santa Fe last night for some sushi (Zen kitchen was closed)
and peeped out some glittery things in the shop windows. I can't wait to do some shopping as I now know that I could live without my glitter and sparkels but why in Buddah's name would I want to? I never want to look like the starndard here...great if it works for them...think lots of fleece and even more Birkenstocks but I would rather light myself on fire as an offering than live so flat and dull...I can't wait to wear high heels again.
Santa Fe itself is like a huge Pioneer Square with alot more color. Lot's of Harley's...no helmet required. Cute shops but all in all not my taste and I could not live here.
It is a four mile round trip walk into town which I have been doing almost daily. One, for the exercise and two, to kill the time. The hills are giving my ass just the dose it needs....I can just feel those True Religions sliding right on.
Some things that are different about me now...
- The other day I was walking along the garden path and a snake almost walked over my flip-flop wearin' foot. I nearly passed out, but again I just breathed my way through it without screaming or running for the city.
- I eat plain yoguart now and I like it.
- I drink water and green tea all day.
- I am being with discomfort without complaining.
Okay to Roderick...thanks for the post and the acnowledgement it meant a lot to read that and brought tears to my eyes. I am really happy you are Nik's best friend. Stay on your journey, for that is the path to freedom.
To Nik,
I sit daily with you in my heart for your life and for our relationship. It is my hope that time spent with each other when I get home will be time spent wisely for both of us. I love you.
To Nino...thanks for taking care of my little girl and for checkin' on the hotel room for me. I love you too.
To Bruno...your a slack ass for not posting to me, but I still love you.
To Autumn and Trystan...I love you both and I beleive that it is on your prayers and wings that I am resting...and being carried thru as this is not easy. Thank you.
To my dad...You are going to win the bet..I am okay and this was the right thing to do. Thanks for betting on me, I love you.
To my brother..you are going to loose the bet..and you should be the next family member to retreat here. I say that cause I love you more than you know.
To my husband...words could NEVER express how much I miss and love you... I am so lucky to be your wife.
To everyone asking and thinking and praying for me thank you from the bottom of my heart. When I get home I am throwing a HUGE ASS PARTY to show my appreciation.
Big Smooch to all of you...wear soemthing glittery today in my honor!!!! Besides it brightens the world.
Love and gratitude,
lotusgirl
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